So I did the final inspection of my new house yesterday.
It was pretty nerve racking as, to be honest, I had completely forgotten what the place was like. I mean I just looked at it once about a month ago and now here I am about to give the current owner a huge amount of money. Anyway I went along with Kath and Andrew and I was a bit non-plussed when I got there. It looked a bit tatty and grotty with all the furniture out of it. This wasn't helped by the fact that the owners have completely stripped the place, they've even taken the bloody clothes line and the pots out of the garden. This isn't a total disaster as the pots were hideous but it doesn't seem in the spirit of selling the place. It also gives me an excuse to spend money at IKEA (more on my Swedish flat-pack fetish another time). Anyway like I say I was a bit disappointed when I got there and looked round, luckily I had A and K to give me positive feedback and now I think I've done the right thing after all. The place just needs a little bit of TLC and the laundry needs a new coat of paint as a matter of urgency. So urgent in fact that I've already got the paint and brushes in the back of the car to go there as soon as it's settled. How's that for keen. Now I just need to sort out where I'm going to put all my furniture (plus the stuff to be bought at IKEA: see, obsessed!). Once I get in there and start painting and changing thing, making it a bit more 'mine' then I know it'll be ok.
Even though I was a bit down when I checked the place out I do know that I have done the right thing. I mean I was walking round Northbridge today and I am so glad that I didn't buy a place there. It's murderville at night and pretty damn grim during the day too. At least in Mount Lawley I've got cool people and nice cafés to go to and there isn't any sort of curfew in place as far as I am aware.
Actually I've been wandering around a few places in Perth over the last couple of weeks and I've decided that I love mount Lawley the most. I know I'm biased, and just trying to maintain property prices, but I think it's got the perfect combination of trendy, grotty and everyday stuff there.
Take Subiaco. It use to be pretty cool, a big chunk of rich people but still plenty of students, artists and what I guess you'd call bohemian types. Now it's just full of rich wankers. To be fair there are still many original people still living there in the streets off Rokeby Road, but most of the new developments: just wankers. I don't think there is another place in WA where you can buy air-fresheners for your car that cost $350. If you don't believe me go into the Simon Johnson shop on Rokeby Road. I guess if you have a Ferrari that cost you $300,000 you might feel a bit cheap putting an Ambi-Pur smelly in it but, really, $350? There's also a "Consultant Hair Stylist" there. What does that even mean? Have they done postgraduate work and registered with the Royal College Of Australian Hairdressers? Do junior hairdressers call them up at 3 am asking how to deal with a particularly bad case of split ends? Just a load of wankers.
I think what really amuses me is the difference between the myth and the reality. For example if you asked most people in Perth what South Perth was like, they'd say "really nice, very posh". In reality, if you walk round Mends Street and South Perth Esplanade it's a bit piss poor. The mall there is half closed and really grotty, the views of the City, which is really the only reason you'd go there, are blocked by loads of trees, and Coco's, which is meant to be a glamorous café/bar, it getting really tired with wobbly tables and very Eighties décor. But they still charge you $9 for a bottle of fizzy water (I'm not making that up. If you ever go to Coco's and they ask if you want water reply, loudly, that 'tap' is fine). Even Perth itself is getting into the act, not realising when something is just a bit shit. I refer, of course, to the "Wheel Of Perth". This is the new ferris wheel we've had erected on the foreshore. After all Melbourne's got one and so have London and Singapore, so surely Perth needs one too. The only tiny problem is that the London wheel is 135m high, Melbourne's is 120m and Singapore's is a whopping 165m. Perth's? Well that's "almost 50m". Wow. I think it arrived on the back of a fairground truck. See, just a bit lame. The reality not matching the hype (I'm talking to you West Australian). In fact there is already a petition to take it down.
Feel free to sign it but I'm not sure anyone will notice that it's gone.
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