Long long ago

I've been travelling round a bit for the last few days and noticed how odd some of the place names are here. You don't notice or think about it when you see them all the time but they are  a bit weird. There's Plump Hill for example. I've been hearing that name since I was born but it only hit me yesterday that it means "Hill that's a bit fat". Possibly. Or Wormington. Where the hell did that come from. Then there are the Slaughters; Upper and Lower. How pretty. Actually they are both gorgeous little Cotswold towns (think Chocolate box). No blood running in the streets or anything.  I even went to Gaydon. Not as gay as you might think as it's the British Motor Industry Heritage Trust Museum. Yes we did used to have one. It's probably the only museum I have ever been in that can cover the complete history of it's subject. They have the first ever Rover car and the last ever Rover car. All a bit sad really. 

I've been on a bit of a engineering history trip for the last few days as I was in Bristol yesterday looking at the SS Great Britain. This was the first iron clad, screw driven passenger ship and was the father of all modern ships. Well apparently, I haven't checked that anywhere but I can't believe that the museum would lie? She's is now back in the same dry dock as she was built 150 years ago, except all the old warehouses and factories that surround it which used to turn out British products to sell round the world and hold the fruits of empire, are all converted into 'luxury executive apartments'. Isambard Kingdom Brunel must be spinning in his tomb. The ship used to ply the emigrant route to Melbourne and I cannot imagine spending 2 months on board on the trip. It's tiny and claustrophobic. The first class bunks are about 18 inches wide. Worse than economy class 'plane seats. If you were in steerage you had to do the chores on the ship. Don't tell united airlines or they'll be getting the passenger to stock the aeroplanes. The weirdest thing on board now was the the fact that the ship felt like it was moving. I don't know why but it really felt like you were rolling in the oceans. Very odd.

The rest of Bristol was a nightmare as they are building a massive new shopping centre in the middle of town called the Cabot centre. I was told there were a few road works etc. but I wasn't expecting the entire side of the city to be completely changed. All the landmarks that were here 2 years ago which I am used to are gone. The problem was exacerbated by the fact that I was trying to navigate from a tiny map from the tourist office. The sort where you turn a corner and the road you wanted to drive down is suddenly a bus lane. Or a one way street. My advice is to buy a GPS thingamebob if you come over here. Bristol itself is a funny town, half is the usual British High St full of chain stores, burger vans and chav girls and boys. The other half is older and funkier. All gourmet grocers, farmhouse cheese and little shops selling t-shirts and other stuff that only students seem to buy. They also have this obsession with building attractions. I don't really understand this as the whole country is like a massive historical attraction as it is. 

For example today I was in Worcester and it looks like a film set. Lots of little narrow streets full of shops, old half timbered shops and buildings. In the cathedral there are a set of effigies of a Knight in Armour, a Squire and a Lady. They date from 1240. That's 850 years old and they are just tucked round a corner. In the US or Australia they'd be be a national historic monument. Mind you compared with the age of the rest of the cathedral they are quite new. I think the main part is 900 something. That's 900 as in the year. I also saw the tomb of Henry VII. He was Henry VIII's brother (these royals really need a bit more imagination, roll on Queen Kylie). When he died his brother Henry VIII married his wife, Catherine of Aragon. This was the start of VIII's problems as he thought he was cursed by God for marrying his dead brother's wife. So begins a great English story and lot's of beheading. King John is also buried here. That's "bad King John", to generations the persecutor of Robin Hood. How cool is that? 

I have to say he looked nothing like the Disney version.